Time passes, the winds of fate change course, and my Dairyland Cheese Journal sheds its crusty carapace and metamorphoses. Yesterday, I was a Cheese Reviewer. Today, I am a Nachos Reviewer, and am as proud of my maturation as a bar mitzvah boy proclaiming his manhood from behind the bina. No more will you see me struggle with adjectives to properly evaluate cheap cheddars and bries! Now, with so many more ingredients under scrutiny, I can review splendidly, even exuberantly, a far more interesting product! OK, let me get right to it:
Linda's serves a decent-sized plate, guaranteed to satisfy two happy barflies, with quality chips and perfectly serviceable pico de gallo salsa. The toppings, while flavorful--cumin lurks heavily among the whole pinto beans--have a kind of sad, dumped-from-a-can look and texture, which aren't adequately hidden by the cheese and sour cream. Memory fails me as to whether these nachos came with guacamole; obviously, this tells you something about the guac situation here.
When you've already knocked back two Makers on ice and are on your third, smoked your taste buds into hibernation, and perhaps found yourself in a yuppier part of town than you're accustomed to, why not pop into Rendezvous and order an appetizer? Sure, you could go all fancy and order "Yam Chips," but fuck that, man, get the nachos! The Rendezvous' nachos are truly wonderous--at least to my soused senses. No guacamole, but this deficiency is generously made up for by two pillowy scoops of sour cream and a light sprinkling of green onion, jalapeno, black beans, and black olives. With salsa on the side and a non-greasy cheese, the chips stayed crisp through the whole ordeal. The true miracle of it all, though, is that I did not get a single speck on my white shirt, despite my altered state. My only criticism of these nachos is that the cheese was still in discernable grated flakes in some places, and close to room temp at serving. 'Nother words, it could have used another 15 seconds or so in the microwave. Also: having these with another glass of Makers was not a great idea. Nachos should always be enjoyed with a pale, dry, Mexican beer. Don't forget that, people.
Stay tuned for more nacho reviews!
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